You Know? Really, I'm Just a Nerd

Yup. That's me. Just a nerd. I called a friend the other day...with really nothing to say. Just wanted to hear her voice. Been awhile. Wish she were closer. Was craving nachos and a beer. Spring has finally arrived weather wise. Time to get out more. Just feeling a bit lonely. sigh. This too shall pass.

I Earned Over $300 Yesterday. What the F*&K Did You Do?

Money Money Money Money.
It's a drug
It's a means to an end.
It makes the world go 'round.
It can make people mean.

Money is important. It tends to suck when money is short. I get that. It's also a good feeling to know that one can earn it. It's a nice feeling to be self-sufficient and not dependent so much upon hand outs. What scares me, however, is when money is used as an indicator of self-worth. The value prescribed to money sometimes seems to overshadow even what money can be used to obtain. Money can then be used as a weapon, even before a single cent is spent. So and so is a better person because they have more money. Really. What's up with that? I tend to value kindness, respect, being good and the like. Although I agree with a solid work ethic, it's really too bad that the most common, and most valued, reward from having one is money. And, if you work really hard and don't make a lot of money, more often than not, you are perceived to be a chump. The notion that some people work hard because they gain a sense of satisfaction from a job well done takes a back seat to what the base rate of pay is. Is it any wonder why there seems to be so much disillusionment creeping into our collective psyche? How about focusing less on how much money is coming in -- yes, I know, keeping in mind the minimums to pay bills for food and housing and the like -- and more about what is really valuable. Being a good person. Loving and being loved. These things don't cost very much monetarily. The value of these things though? To me? Priceless.

I'm Tired

Nothing profound. Except maybe that I'm profoundly tired? Really. The only thing that is keeping me from heading straight to bed right now is the perverse joy I gain from delayed gratification. And J is working late tonight so I get the entire bed to myself. Joy and Bliss! Today after dropping the kids off at daycare I went to the gym and did a double workout of cardio and weights. I then came home and spring cleaned the upstairs bathroom while doing a couple loads of laundry. I just finished with the toilet when I realized it was time to get dressed and go. My old grad advisor was doing a talk this afternoon and she had called the other day to inform me of it. I actually dressed up for the occasion--short skirt, black tights. Her talk was brilliant. The theme du jour was art vs? aesthetics. Moving away from using the privileged gaze, she discussed the idea of truth in terms of sound--music. Instead of abandoning truth, she argues that a new way of addressing it is required...apart from the truth vs. false dichotomy. The end result is part performance, part treatise, part entreaty, part discourse...I dig it. I do sense a bit of my own work ... I like to think that perhaps, when our brains met, something clicked for both of us. Thoughts like these keep me going as I sweep dust bunnies out from beneath my bed. It was nice to voyage back into the academic world for a bit. I actually had learned minds speak to me as an equal (I love crashing symposiums where I'm not really known by anybody so I'm often treated like a somebody...cuz you never really can tell who I am eh?) It also helps when you are greated warmly by one of the speakers/chair of the department. I've never really understood heirarchy. I mean, I get that it's necessary. I work in theatre. When the relationship between production staff and directors and stage managers becomes vague, all hell can break loose. Yet, these heirarchical distinctions only really apply when there is a show. After the show is over, the titles don't really mean much. The titles, as far as I can see it, are there to allow for the work to get done in a more efficient/smooth manner. Granted, I come at this as someone with a house gig. I don't have to work the room to ensure employment. Mind, I've never really felt the need to suck up for a job or opportunity even when I was basically unemployed (although I have sucked up for the pure unadulterated fun of it!). Is this privilege or luck? Probably a bit of both. But, enough of this. My duvet awaits!

Feeling a bit stiff

I whacked my head the other day. It was a pretty good fall. I returned from work around midnight, walked my mother-in-law to her car, reparked my car and, as I was walking back to the house, I slipped on a patch of ice. It has been very icy out back of late. So, I went ass over teakettle and the extent of my injuries are thus:
I slammed my tail bone in to the ice.
I whacked both of my wrists...causing stigmata type bleeding and some bruising as well.
I slammed the back of my head -- my glasses flew off about 4 feet
My head bounced up and I gave my self a mild? case of whiplash (the stiffness didn't appear until the end of the next day).
Overall, this was a pretty good fall. Right up there with the one that occured back in my cross country running days whereupon I slipped going down a hill, gashed open both knees, sprained one ankle, twisted the other ankle only to have my coach, who was running behind me, stomp on my right hand and kick me in the head with his cleats.

I'm much better now.

I've been thinking about my poor neglected guitar lately.

at the gym

Today was weight day. So, here's what I did:

Ball squat with shoulder press. Definition? Take a big ball and put it behind shoulders against wall. Go down to squat position while pressing weights up. First rep of 12 = 10lbs and the second rep of 12 = 12lbs.

Chest Press. Is how it sounds. First rep of 20 = 15lbs and the second rep of 15 = 20lbs.

Ball Crunches with straight arms. I lie on the big ball and then do crunches. Simple yet painful. First time I did 20, the second I did 25.

Reverse Lunges with Bicep Curl. I really really really loathe these. Yet. They are making my butt better than it's ever been. Each set 20 on each side. First set with 12lbs. Second with 15lbs.

Close Grip Low Row. A pulling machine. First rep of 20 = 70lbs. Second rep of 20 = 85lbs.

Inner Thighs. Yup. The sex machine. Always conveniently placed in front of a window. First rep of 15 = 110lbs. Second rep of 15 = 115lbs.

Outer Thighs. Same machine. Different angle. I like this one cuz I feel strong. First rep of 15 = 145lbs. Second rep of 15 = 155lbs.

Overhead Tricep Extension while sitting on the ball. First rep of 15 = 15lbs. Second rep of 20 = 20lbs.

After each set, I do crunches. After I'm done, I go home. Tonight, J has a 3am call. I have a 12 out of 12 scheduled for tomorrow. No gym for me. I'll have to do cardio and weights on Sunday. Funny how this is becoming slightly addictive.

Because there are people who want to know...Really!

A typical week day:

Alarm goes off at 6am. I kick J to get him to turn it off. If this is not successful, I look to see if one of the kidlings is in bed in order to get them to do it. If this does not work, I growl and get out of bed (the alarm is across the room...you can guess why) and press snooze. I stumble back to bed and push J out of the way (he always seems to steal my pillow during this time...sneaky bastard) and try to ignore the whining and mewling from the most annoying cats in the world. One drools and the other sounds like a rusty gutter pipe scraping against a tin roof. Finally, I get up, go downstairs and feed the beasts and put on coffee. I go back upstairs and very unceremoniously turn on the light in the kids' room and announce that they have 5 minutes to get dressed and get downstairs or I'll choose their outfits for the day! This is usually enough for my girl to leap out of bed and scream 'no mamma...I'll pick my own clothes!' The boy will squirm and flail his arms about and say things like 'go away I'm tired.' After a few more minutes of threatening and cajoling and, let's face it, playing, the kids and I are dressed and we go downstairs for breakfast.

Kids eat oatmeal or cereal. I wash left over dishes from night before and clean out stinky reeking cat box. I get the kids' lunches ready (hopefully I was aware enough the night before to make them in advance). Depending on what's in the fridge, the lunches range from gourmet feasts to siberian work camp fare. After breakfast, I send the kids back upstairs to brush their teeth. I follow them after downing a coffee and taking out some form of protein from the freezer for dinner. I then go upstairs in order to make sure the kids brush their teeth. I then send them downstairs to begin the chore of snowpants, boots and the like. Finally they are ready. I am ready. We get out the door (hopefully before 8am), get in the car and boot off to their school. After dropping them off, I race off to begin my 'work day.' Even writing it sounds funny.

I usually chat with my supervisor/friend (the best combo really) and see what's up ahead for the day. I take a break around 10am for coffee and a muffin and to read the daily free paper. After that I do what needs to be done until lunch. If it's busy, I'll skip lunch. If it's not too busy I'll walk down to the caf and grab some noodles or sushi.

The afternoon usually flies by and by quitting time (4:30 or 5) what was needed to get done has been done. What sorts of things you may ask? Well, things like getting technical info from clients about upcoming productions, making sure our stock inventory is up to date, making sure professors are able to work their gear, making sure gear works, fixing what I can, sending stuff out for repair when I can't, dealing with and keeping on top of silly new safety legislations, updating coming events info, booking staff for gigs...etc. etc. and so on. If there is an evening event, I stick around until it starts in order to make sure that all is running smooth.

I then get in the car and go pick up the kids from school and take them home. If J has been home, he usually takes care of dinner but, if he's been working, we'll throw something together when I get home. The kids get a snack and watch some t.v. until dinner is cooking then they start their homework. At this point I might throw in a load of laundry. After dinner, I get the dishes, J gets the table and the kids get upstairs for playtime/jammie time/teeth time.

After the dishes, I'll go the gym for an hour or so. When I get back, if the kids aren't in bed yet, we put them there. The laundry moves to the dryer. I sit with J for a while like a lump on the couch. We fold laundry when it's ready. I make the kids lunches for the next day. We watch t.v. I might do some computer stuff. I go upstairs, shower and go to bed.

All in all it's a pretty good life.