Cycling

So I had a committee meeting today over the lunch hour. Lunch was free and quite tasty. Not ever being one to shy away from a free meal I dove right in. Now, in this particular committee, the other members are women ranging in age from mid 30's to mid 60's. Each one, without fail, commented upon her weight with things like...how she really shouldn't have any carbs...that potato salad was yummy but deadly and, my personal favourite, 'oh...that one and 1/4 sandwiches has done me in.' Yikes. Now I'm not thin and I too have had my own battles with the bulge (ok...still do) but, it seems a little strange to be talking about how one shouldn't eat while lunch is being served. I have a young daughter and, I'll be damned if she has to feel guilty about enjoying a yummy meal. It's a really hard cycle to break...this was brought home to me again when watching my own mother fuss in front of the mirror after we decided to 'dress up' for dinner...stating that she should really have worn smaller underwear so that her belly wouldn't show as much. A grandmother can't even be happy the way she is. I really hope that I will be able to look into future mirrors and appreciate what's there. Guess I should start doing that sort of thing now eh?

Another odd committee thing is that for the past couple meetings, I have been disagreeing with the group on a number of issues. This week, those same issues came out and I found that people were agreeing with what I had said. At first, I was flattered, until I figured out that no reference to my ever having had any opinion on these issues was made. My ideas were being argued from out of other people's mouths. This is what the writer must feel when touring the movie set while her work is being (re)worked. Very weird feeling. Voyeuristic. Strange being both manipulator and manipulated. I'm now interested in seeing if this type of thing will happen again. It's become very tempting to argue things for the sake of mental masturbation...with no real attachment to the issues at hand...and see how many can be made to come on side. Kinda like that scientology hubbert? fellow. You know, the ex-science fiction writer who, at one book signing mentioned out loud that the best way to become rich was to start one's own religion...several years later, voila.

Is it even possible anymore for people to think for themselves?